by Irfan Mahar 27 May 2022
The perception of harassment worldwide is commonly associated with men. However, the statistics of the recorded and reported cases of harassment show that men are the culprit of harassing women compared to women’s harassment of men. But it does not mean that women do not harass their male counterparts. On the contrary, there are various reported cases of women’s harassment towards men because of the social structure of the world where women are considered the victim, weak and suppressed class. Therefore, most men do not report or record cases of harassment against women. One of the main reasons behind this is the social environment/structure of the world, where men feel insecure about registering harassment cases against women. Because they feel uncertain about the social system, and they think that if they do this, then firstly, no one will believe them, and no one will take their side. Likewise, many people believe that so-called weak, innocent, and suppressed women can harass a male in society.
There are multiple forms of women’s harassment of men, such as direct/overt or indirect/covert harassment. Such as the most common form of harassment is direct harassment, where women directly harass men through multiple physical signs. But the most lethal and dangerous harassment is indirect or covert harassment, such as many women use various techniques for men’s work. Through this, they use their counterparts to accept their demands which are kept by them and in return, they would give them the favour of any kind, mainly the physical ones. It is a fact that men are feeble when it comes to physical favour by women. They accept it abruptly without spending second thinking about it. Most men, particularly in third world countries, are frustrated and desperate; that’s why they immediately accept legal or illegal offers from women.
Additionally, “Our laws are skewed towards women, who mostly get the benefit of the doubt in a dispute. Countless women lodge false cases or misuse laws to ruin men”. For example, Rakesh Sheth, a 41-year-old man found dead in Gujarat, India, stated in his suicide letter, “If I die, my wife will like it, and he also added that my wife can lead a carefree life. My mother-in-law and father-in-law worship wealth. They do not care about human life. So, I am ending my life”. That man was harassed by his wife and mother-in-law within six months of his marriage. He took his own life when he could not withstand it anymore. Similarly, Prem Chandra Pandey vs Smt. Savitri Pandey. “The wife has filed a false case on the husband and his family, that they demanded dowry before and after marriage. The wife’s father did not fulfil the demands, so they tortured her, and she alleged a fake allegation that he had a marriage with another woman and again married only to fulfil his satisfaction demands”. All these allegations were proved wrong. Hence, the court held that those false allegations of adultery amount to cruelty.
Though a solid and logical argument, yes, many women harass their male counterparts in any particular society and throughout the world. For instance, 6,822 sexual harassment claims were filed with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) in 2015; men filed 17.1 per cent of those cases. Meanwhile, most men did not report their harassment or file a claim because they were afraid of being mocked. Moreover, they may believe that a woman cannot sexually harass men. There are multiple ways women harass men, and it is a well-established fact as well. However, the real problem of our society is that whatever unfavourable happens between the male and female, it is always a male who is to blame. It is because of a stereotype and perceptions that have been practised in our society for a long time. Although a few people in traditional communities like Pakistan think rationally and accept things based on reasons, logic, and proper research, most people prefer and favour the old-established traditions and stereotypes, even illogical and false perceptions. Is all this because of the immature state of mind, environment, social structure, lack of proper education, family structure, or the distinct fields? Similarly, people do not want to be interested in various areas either it prefers a specific/particular lot. Therefore, there is a dire need to raise awareness that men are not always predators and women are not always innocent.
The writer is PhD scholar in the Department of Defense and Strategic Studies, Quaid-i-Azam University Islamabad, Pakistan.